What I Can't Like

The youngest of the Brooks boys, little R.J., had a wonderful saying when he was about four years old.  Here's an example:

You:  R.J., you have to eat your vegetables.
R.J.:  I can't like that.

R.J. has since grown taller and wiser in the 3 years since, but I often use his astute quote to sum up my feelings about a lot of things.  In the spirit of Letterman, I offer you a list of Things I Can't Like:

10) Jealous Ass People
I mean really - the energy you expend being jealous of hater-ific about somebody else's success is the same energy you can use to get your own shit together.

9) People Who Act Like Reading Will Kill Them
Are you serious?  It's going to kill you read an article and formulate a viewpoint?  *yawn*

8)People Who Think That The Way It Used to Be is the Way It Still Should Be
Progress, people.  Yes, your Sony Walkman may still work fine but does that really mean you can't upgrade to an mp3 player?

7)Political Extremists, from either side
"Political extremism involves two prime ingredients: an excessively simple diagnosis of the world's ills, and a conviction that there are identifiable villains in back of it all." - John W. Gardner

6) Math and Numbers
If you hid my dinner inside a geometry proof, I'd eventually die of starvation because I would never free it.

5) People Who Don't Discipline Their Children and Allow Them to Act Ignorant in Public
You should consider removing yourself from the social roulette wheel because nobody wants to deal with that shit. Nobody.

4) Winter
I'm from Indiana. Enough said.

3) People Who Talk About How Much They Make, in Embarrassing Detail
Tre tacky. Who does that? I'm not embarrassed that I don't make that much, but I am embarrassed for you and your thirst for validation.

2) Coconut
A gritty, disgusting food crime in itself. Strangely enough, I like coconut scented things. But if I even think it's in a dish, I canNOT like it.

...................and the number one thing that I Can't Like...........

1) Waiting in Line
i. hate. it. more. than. anything.